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Am I able to Do Anything to end My 17-Year-Old From Sex?

Am I able to Do Anything to end My 17-Year-Old From Sex?

SheKnows Editorial

Welcome to Survivor, for which writer Catherine Newman attempts to answr fully your questions regarding adolescents and exactly why they’re like this — and exactly how to love them despite every thing.

Have concern for Newman? Deliver it to her here.

Question:

We suspect our 17-year-old son along with his girlfriend are receiving intercourse, though we now haven’t talked to him about any of it straight. We cause them to become maintain the home open when she’s over [and] don’t let her invest the evening. just just What else can we do in order to stop them or, at least, maybe not seem permissive?

Response:

Bear while I detour around answering your question with me, please.

Because I would like to back up first and sort out just what is apparently your fundamental presumption — which is that 17-year-olds shouldn’t be sex that is having.

I understand that there’s a hidden script we’re inclined to check out as moms and dads — i believe it is the one we’ve lifted from our personal childhoods, even when it reflects elements of those childhoods that weren’t therefore valuable. We reflexively talk a number of the a few ideas and objectives our very own moms and dads had: that teens are sluggish, they’re hard, they can’t be trusted, they’re too young to own intercourse. But we don’t think this final holds true ( or the sleep from it, for example).